Father-Daughter Rafting & Reconnecting on the Rogue
By KEEN Fan Ron Smith, editor in chief of The Digital Outdoorsman
People used to call it the need to “decompress,” “get away,” “clear your head,” and “unwind.” When these terms were used in conversations they were being applied to adults. As we know, times have changed and continue to change at an even more accelerating pace. These various terms are now often combined into the modern need to “unplug” and it’s a term that is not only used relative to adults but to our children.
My KEENs gave me and my daughter a chance to unplug together.
REAL VIEWS, NOT SCREEN VIEWS
Unplugging today refers to “disconnecting from something.” For our children, it means disconnecting from their phones, wristwatches, gaming devices, and any other device that connects them to the Internet or communicating using a device rather than in person. Not only is the connection to these gadgets a challenge for their growth, our children are spending less time in the outdoors. It’s a serious challenge with significant ramifications.
According to a 2015 study by Common Sense Media, American youth between the ages of 8 and 18 are logging an average of 7.5 hours of screen time per day, and that’s not counting time spent using media for school or homework.
According to a 2015 study by Common Sense Media, American youth between the ages of 8 and 18 are logging an average of 7.5 hours of screen time per day, and that’s not counting time spent using media for school or homework. Richard Louv has explored the growing gap between children and outdoors. In his 2005 book, Last Child in the Woods, he discusses the disconnect and how it impacts children’s physical and emotional health. His research indicates that the large growth in childhood depression, obesity and inability to focus can be attributed to children spending so much time indoors.
As a parent of a 13-year-old daughter, I am worried that we are especially failing our girls. According to a 2015 study in The Journal of Pediatric Psychology, parents are four times as likely to tell girls to be careful than boys. Girls are warned away from activities that hint of risk. Parents are more likely to assist their sons to face their fears with instructions on how to complete the task on their own. We need to teach both boys and girls the skills they need to be confident, responsible problem solvers and risk takers.
My challenge as a parent is: How do I execute to achieve this goal? How do I help them grow up loving the outdoors? What steps can I take to foster this love? How do I bridge from the reality that, like me, many parents today will be the last generation to have grown up without being “plugged into the internet” as a child?
TAKING ACTION BY TAKING THE PLUNGE TOGETHER
Recently as part of my commitment to share the importance of the Wild & Scenic Rivers Act, I arranged to take my daughter on her first multi-day river trip. I chose the Rogue River in Oregon as our destination, particularly its 46-mile Wild & Scenic section. We made arrangements with a longtime outfitter, Rogue Wilderness Adventures. We would raft for three days, camp out for two nights, and take all our own equipment for camping.
Our guides were terrific. The Sotar rafts we used were remarkable in the water. Our group of 18 was great and one other youngster was along—a boy in high school. We were also fortunate to have Bob Rafalovich as one of the guides. Bob has guided for 44 years on the Rogue. He founded the original outfitting company on the Rogue and he worked with government agencies to implement the Wild & Scenic Act on the Rogue. He was filled with stories and insights few others have.
We floated, we ran rapids, we hiked, we saw Zane Grey’s original 1939 cabin, we spent time at a true swimming hole up a side creek, we jumped off boats, swam in the river, saw black bears, shared stories with others, watched the Perseid meteor shower, learned about new flora and fauna, and Kira got to try rowing leading up to her taking the boat through a class 2 rapid.
What did she learn? Here’s what she highlighted:
• Anything is possible but you have to be brave enough to try
• How to deal with initial failure and turn it into success with perseverance
• How to take risks and be more confident in taking them
• The value of patience
• The ability to be honest with each other and to laugh at ourselves
• To allow yourself to feel fear and let it pass through you
• It important to have a positive attitude in order to succeed
• Moving forward is the only option
• The most important things in life are personal relationships and a wanting to grow
• Liked not being tethered to her phone and free to really focus on where she was and what she was doing
• And there is only one person responsible for living the life you want; You.
CONNECTING BY DISCONNECTING
The river provided me with a means to connect with my daughter, before, during and after the trip we took on it. The river gave us the means to create memories, stories, and experiences to help us grow as father-daughter and as individuals.
Our forests allowed us to detach from mind-numbing messages and become attentive to what was around us and be spontaneous.
Our forests provided us with scenes of beauty and wonder that are hard to really capture in photos or videos. Our forests allowed us to detach from mind-numbing messages and become attentive to what was around us and be spontaneous. It allowed us space away from digital expectations that are placed on us and it was wonderfully freeing.
When we give our children and ourselves this type of space, it provides moments of clarity, inspiration, and illumination. We can begin to see that much of the daily “hype” in being connected does not serve us. While out in these natural cathedrals without walls, we lose our connected identity and we become but a nameless observer of nature, allowing us to connect with the fundamental essence of who we are as human beings.
Every KEEN has a story, and we love hearing yours! If you’re getting outside and unplugging with your family, tell us about it. Just tag @KEEN or pass along your story to firstname.lastname@example.org for a chance to be featured. Happy trails (and rivers)!